noa wants me to make pictures of her. she can’t sit still. later, when i show her the pictures, she won’t believe it is her. i wonder how it is to live, without a sense of ‘me’. without all that identification we collected and created in life. same as with the early years in life, i guess death forces us to give up our identity. to surrender to something bigger than ourselves.
i am packing my bag for germany and the netherlands. a few days of rehearsals and performances, and then i will take time for my friends and myself. i am nervous and excited about going, but convinced that it is the right thing to do.